What is a midlife crisis?

On this page you will find out what a midlife crisis exactly entails and how you can handle such a situation.

What is a midlife crisis?

You go through multiple phases in life. The midlife crisis comes into being around the 40th year of age and is the period after our adult life and before the life of a senior. The midlife crisis is often associated with a man who buys a new car, takes a young woman as his new girlfriend and is spending a lot of attention for his appearance. The image does not totally match the reality however, because a lot of women are also experiencing a midlife crisis. The midlife crisis arises in general from the 30th year of age until the 60th. Everybody goes through the phase, but not for everyone it will become a crisis. Scientific research has shown that a midlife crisis can have a hormonal basis. A midlife crisis is usually not visible on the appearance of someone, but only on the inside. Often someone experiencing a midlife crisis asks himself the following questions:

• Is this really the life I'm living?
• Who did I become?
• Did I reach my goals?
• Am I happy?

It is quite special to ask yourself such questions, but the result does not always have to be that positive. You can become unsatisfied, feel empty or even frustrated. At the same time you will realise that already more than half of your life has gone past. Some people get really confused from this and realise it is too late to accomplish certain dreams. In the end the midlife crisis comes down to the gap between who you want to be and who you have become. The realisation that you did not become who you wanted to be can be a hard one. In some cases a midlife crisis can take multiple years.

Symptoms of a midlife crisis

The midlife crisis consists of different periods. The one moment you can be restless and at other times you can be busy in making changes in your work, the way of life or other areas in life. Summarised a midlife crisis is paired with the following symptoms:

• Longing for the past. It is often regarding a period when you were studying or a period in high school. 
• Finding your life goal. Finding and developing your life goal is something you are busy with your whole life. During the midlife crisis, you have an extra focus on this.
• External looks change. You are becoming a different person and sometimes a change in appearance belongs to this. During a midlife crisis you often try to look a little younger. 
• Taking risks. The taking of risks is often done by men and often shows itself in making big investments or undertaking risky actions.
• Getting started with a dream. Possibly you have a dream but you never had the time to do something with it. During a midlife crisis you start to realise that the clock is ticking and often people have the inclination to start doing something about a dream of the past. 
• Addictions are on the radar. The midlife crisis can sometimes take on a dangerous form and so getting stuck in addictions is one of the possibilities. An alcohol or other drug addiction thus sometimes have something to do with the midlife crisis. 
• Making expensive purchases. You may get the feeling that you want to prove yourself and sometimes you get the desire to start to buy costly things. Think about the purchase of a sports car or a motor boat. 
• Social circumstances change. Often a person in a midlife crisis takes distance from his or her family and start seeing friends of the past again for instance. 

Getting through a midlife crisis

A midlife crisis is not always negative and in many cases something beautiful comes out of this often difficult phase in life. When you handle this phase in the right way you can get a lot out of the midlife crisis when you accept the situation. You have to go through the crisis to overcome it and when you recognise the signals it becomes easier to protect yourself from the risks.
Don't take any decisions that you didn't think through and stay in contact with your surroundings. When you start to make ungrounded decisions, or become destructive, you can later regret this behaviour. Make sure that you keep a positive attitude and search for the things that really matter to you. Ask yourself with every decision if it is the right one and if that is also the case for the long term. When you are tied up with yourself it is important to find help. A psychologist can help you come to a solution by asking you the right questions, and this can bring about peace.
Preventing a midlife crisis is not really possible. The midlife crisis is something that simply happens to you and it is thus hard to prevent. Live as consciously as possible to not get stuck in the midlife crisis. When you experience a midlife crisis you are often to late and then you just have to go through this period. You can prevent a midlife crisis in your life by living your life with awareness of yourself. By being aware and conscious you are not walking up against a wall and asking yourself certain questions can then become a meaningful experience.
Ask yourself once in a while if you are happy in your current situation and try to come up with many reasons why this is the case. Are you enjoying your work? Are you happy in your relationship? Are you happy in the house that you live in? Are you happy with the friends that you have? When you live your life consciously and aware it sometimes feels as if time stops and you feel fully alive. Because of becoming aware the chances of getting a midlife crisis become a lot smaller and you can go through it instead of circling around it.